mohrbr

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A lovely bit of cabin fever

HW 23 – COMMENTS ON BIG BIG STORY PRIMARY SOURCE SUMMARY & ANALYSIS

My mentor was very busy this last few days and would post her comment as soon as she can.

Portage

I feel that your writing keeps the reader engaged. I enjoyed it.l iIke wise agree wite your metaphor to The Wall by Pink Floyd, a presantation of the tourtoured mind of humanity. Your refrences heigten your over all message and I feel that your writing expresses actuall intrest in the topic instead of simpley being a mindless dron.

followed by my reply
    Thank you for your comment. I had a hard time understanding your comment considering that most of your words were not completed and the grammar errors had made the sentence dense. Thank you never the less.

Mohr

Simon

Simon

Comment on his blog:

I appreciate how you immediately detached yourself from the suspicion that you think how Nietsche’s mind works. I felt that your both summery and analysis (which I assume is few isolated lines but I am not sure) lacked depth and originality.  Try adding more insight in future analysis.

Mohr

Reply to comment on my blog:

Thank you for both caring that you missed some of my blogs and for pointing out my improvements. I am sorry that my writing had seemed pretentious, and I am doubly so based on the irony of the situation. While I do feel that life is pointless I did not want to sound too dramatic and over the top. I want to reassure you that I do not think that I comprehend the teaching of an acclaimed philosopher better than him and it was not my intention appear pretentious.

Mohr

Naomi

Comment on her post:

I was very interested in the history surrounding the Talmud.  However I felt like you could have elaborated more about the Shabbat, what are the laws surrounding the Shabbat and what’s your opinion on the matter. To me the majority of your sentences felt like bullet points and I recommended trying to relate the sentences to one another.

Mohr

Reply Reply to comment on my blog:

Thank you. I do feel that this post was the most cohesive one I wrote lately considering that while writing the other posts I was exploring my big story. I will try to keep my posts less wordy in the future.

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